Jerudong Park Playground, however, must positively be the weirdest amusement park in the world. Literally. Think of a place as big as Disneyland (it is huge) but entirely deserted (remember, nobody lives in Brunei, anyhow). Two thirds of the rides are closed, it’s only open at night and hardly lit, so you almost can’t even find your way around. Then there’s a ‘musical fountain’ playing hits that must have been in when the thing was opened (stuff like Backstreet Boys). It is weird.

Best of all, though, is the story of the park’s creation: it’s a birthday present. The sultan of Brunei, the absolute monarchical ruler of his country, gave it to his country, at his birthday. Well, he has too much money anyhow — he’s estimated to have $10 billion in the bank, plus some other extras like the world’s biggest Rolls-Royce collection (200 of ‘em). Whatever.

We spent the last few days in the Kelabit Highlands, beautifully situated in the mountainous hinterland. They are accessible only by air — a small 19-seater propeller plane will take you there (it’s subsidized by the government to make it affordable for locals). This doesn’t sound so bad but consider the implications: the price of all non-local goods multiplies as they have to be flown in. Electricity is only available from generators and that only for a few hours each day (diesel is very expensive since it has to be flown in). Ergo, no fridge. Food is purely local — rice, jungle fern, wild boar, fish from the local streams (and it’s quite delicious!). Everything perishable has to be eaten within days. It is quite amazing — at least for my generation, so used to modern civilization.

Go into the jungle, though, and the adventure really starts. Finding your way is hard enough (though a guide does help with that…). But then it’s also full of leeches (Blutegel) — you surely heard of them though you might prefer not to think about them. They really are quite annoying and impossible to keep off you! Imagine seeing one on your shoe, searching for blood by slowly making its way inside. Of course, you try to flick it off — which won’t work because they stick on so well. Then you try plucking it off — just to find it on your finger. Now, you probably start panicking because you cannot shake it off — though it’s really not so bad, at least if you wear leech-proof socks. The guides don’t even bother, they just pick them off their feet once they’re back home.

It’s quite the experience — and really worth it. Though, I do have to say, these couple of days were enough for me.